


Roses Are the Worst

by rixsig-writes (rixsig)



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Nonbinary Vanderwood, Other, This is one of the best days of Seven's life, Vanderwood is allergic to emotion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-09-08 18:22:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8856034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rixsig/pseuds/rixsig-writes
Summary: Vanderwood gives in and sleeps with Zen once after weeks of persistent romancing thinking that will be the end of it. Obviously they don't know Zen very well.





	

**Author's Note:**

> why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this why did i write this

Vanderwood should have known Seven wouldn’t let it go. They have half a mind to just walk out of Seven’s apartment, but they get the feeling Seven wouldn’t let them escape quite that easily.

“Wait, so you two actually did it?” Seven says, gasping dramatically, hand on the side of his face,  “And to think you kept tragically spurning his heartfelt advances before!”

“We didn’t join hands and go frolicking through the meadows,” Vanderwood says acidly, “We just had sex once. It’s not a big deal.”

“I see~” Seven ponders, stroking his chin, “So if it wasn’t a big deal, why do I still sense that there’s an issue somewhere, hmmm? Detective Seven Zero Seven, on the case!”

“I don’t need you in my personal business.” Vanderwood scowls.

“But we’re not co-workers anymore!” Seven says, throwing his hands up, “Everything is personal business now!”

“Ugh…”

“So what is it, what is it…” Seven muses, “A fight? A love triangle? A near-death experience?!”

“ _Stop it._ ” Vanderwood resists the urge to bury their face in their hands. Why did they decide to be friends with this bastard again?

“He is hot though, right?” Seven jabs him knowingly with his elbow, “Everyone thinks he’s hot. It’s a universal constant.”

“Of course he’s hot,” Vanderwood says, “That’s not the problem.”

“Ha! I knew there was a problem!” Seven crows, “Is he bad at sex???”

Vanderwood hates to admit it, but— “No…”

“So what’s the problem then?” Seven asks, curious.

Vanderwood’s face instantly sours. “He keeps sending me flowers.”

Seven howls so hard with laughter that he falls backwards off the couch. Vanderwood hears the smack as he hits the ground and hopes it hurts. Why are they even talking to Seven about this anyway? It’s not like they should have been expecting useful advice from him. This idiot fell ass backwards into his own relationship, Vanderwood wouldn’t trust him as far as they could throw him.

“Who even does that?” Vanderwood sighs, putting a hand to their forehead, “I have three whole bouquets rotting in the trash now. My apartment stinks of roses.”

“BAHAHA a-actually that sounds, haha, exactly like Zen, but at _you?_ Giving, pssshthaha! Giving _you_ flowers?” Seven crawls around to the front of the couch and tries to get up but gives up and flops down to ride out his hysterics, clutching at his sides, “W-w-what are you going to do???”

Vanderwood crosses their arms. “Ignore it.”

“I-Ignore it.” Seven parrots, pressing his lips together and struggling to keep his face passive.

“What,” Vanderwood snaps, “You want to say something. Say it.”

“Mmmffaaahhaaha, nothing!” Seven cackles, “Nothing, nothing, nothing!”

“It was a one-night stand!” Vanderwood yells, “He knows that!”

Their phone buzzes in their pocket and even though they know it’s not anything to do with a mission—they’ve quit that life now—old habits die hard. The phone is out and unlocked in less than a second. Vanderwood blinks at the phone in their hand, nonplussed, and Seven immediately perks up.

“What is it?” Seven asks, scrabbling to his knees and leaning in.

Vanderwood jerks the phone away by reflex and only realizes what a bad idea that is halfway through the motion. Seven's eyes zero in on it with a grin that screams ‘target acquired’ and he instantly jumps for it. Vanderwood just barely manages to jerk it away from his grasp, but in the process loses their hold on it. The phone goes flying out of their hand, bouncing off the floor and sliding all the way to the other side of the room. It bumps the wall and stops.

Then it buzzes again.

Seven launches himself at it, scrambling hand over foot and leaving Vanderwood in the dust. Vanderwood leaps off the couch and follows, but they’re too slow, Seven’s already got his hands on it, unlocking it with ease even though Vanderwood literally just changed the password for it yesterday.

“Ooooooh wow,” Seven gapes, reddening, “Haha, oh wow oh wow, I’ve seen a lot of selfies from him but not one like this~”

“What the fuck are you talking about,” Vanderwood rolls their eyes. The picture had just been Zen winking at the camera with a kissy face trying to be charming. Probably taken from inside the man’s apartment. Nothing unusual. Just embarrassing to have because the damned idiot is trying to...to _woo_ them. “Just give me my phone back.”

“Do you think Zen would be mad if I saved a copy?” Seven says, staring at the screen, ignoring them, “My girlfriend probably wouldn't mind one either…”

Vanderwood snatches the phone away from him while he’s distracted and looks at it themself and—

“I know, right?” Seven waggles his eyebrows.

It’s the whole, muscled expanse of Zen’s naked chest tapering into those elegant hips, cock jutting out, flushed red. Vanderwood can see a hint of his inner thighs before they get cut off by the edge of the screen. Vanderwood looks closely but can’t see any marks left over from when they had sex last week. Well, they _have_ heard he heals like a monster...someone would have to be very dedicated to keep anything visible on him…

“Oh. My. God,” Seven says, dumbfounded.

“What.”

“You’re going to fuck him again, aren’t you?!” Seven accuses. He collapses back into laughter, tipping into the wall, “Hahaha, no way, are you serious?! Didn’t you just say you were going to ignore him??”

Vanderwood still can’t look away from their phone but their mouth slants in annoyance. “I’m ignoring the romance bullshit, that doesn’t mean I can’t have sex with him.”

“Aaaaaah, right, right, because that won’t get his hopes up or anything,” Seven says, “You know he’s going to ask you out at least twice as often if you try to be fuckbuddies.”

“Then I’ll just wait him out,” Vanderwood says, “If I keep turning him down he’ll get the picture eventually.”

“Uh-huh.” Seven’s mouth twitches, “So much for a one-night stand.”

“Shut up.” Vanderwood slips the phone away and starts leaving.

“Hey!” Seven calls from behind them, “When you get there ask him about the picture for me!”

Vanderwood flips him off over their shoulder, not looking back.

When they get outside they fish out a cigarette and light it up immediately, bringing it up to their mouth. They know Zen smokes too, but they haven’t been around when he’s done it. He’d probably taste pretty good that way, with the smoke on his tongue...Vanderwood curses at themself, eyes squinting. This is such a stupid idea, Seven’s right. But well.

At least it will be interesting.

**Author's Note:**

> this is all the fault of @yookims and @fothetinyotter how dare u do this to me


End file.
